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Sunday, November 8, 2015

Sickness And Re-Birth #AmericanHorrorStory #AHSHotel #DVRRewind

Sickness And Re-Birth #AmericanHorrorStory #AHSHotel #DVRRewind

All pictures courtesy of FX 

As NaBloPoMo pushes forward (more on that later), I find myself nearly overwhelmed with all of the writing. Today is someone important's birthday and I can't sit and write all day. But I will try to sneak in a blog post before I have to stop and give all my attention to them.

This week's DVR rewind is once again American Horror Story Hotel (#AHSHotel). Like any good fan, I've been keeping up every week with my DVR (sometimes I can't watch it live because I have to write or am watching something else), and man has it become crazy. Vampires galore and ghosts killing people in deadly ghost parties, and Angela Bassett still looking fine at her age (side note: I have a little crush on Angela Bassett. So what, it's not a crime!). They're throwing a lot of movie motifs and tropes at us and though we've seen and read plenty of them before, they feel fresh.


After last week's discovery that her son was still living (sorta) in the Hotel Cortez with Lady Gaga as his new mom, Alex the nurse married to the detective agreed to become a "vampire" just like her son so she could be around him forever. This week's episode "Room Service" opened with her not yet conformed to the full effects. A sickly dead look on her face, she works to cure the boy with measles and holistic parents. Near death because his parents neglected to give him a measles vaccination, Alex does the dumbest thing ever and pumps the boy's IV full of some of her own blood after gorging on a few packets locked in storage. Now watch this stupid chick next week as she tries to convince Gaga that she didn't know what would happen. If she says that I will give her the most severe side eye the world has ever known. With the child first appearing fine, hell breaks loose as the mother takes the boy home and suddenly things start turning very Salem's Lot-ty.


The boy does in his parents the morning before going off to school on what was the school's celebration day of Halloween. Costumed up, he talks to his best female friend and gets her to sneak away to the closet in back of the room to kiss. Mind you they're only around nine or ten years old but they get caught when he bites the girl's lip and allows her to taste his blood. And so the infection begins. The teacher's throat slit, he turns his entire class, which then try gorging on another man who I can only guess was the principal. By the time it ends, every adult is dead and the vampire children have to be "rescued" by SWAT from the tall gunman wearing all black--a lie they crafted.


Meanwhile, Angela Bassett's and Matt Bomer's characters plot to bring down Queen Gaga. With Matt out of the picture as her main boy-toy squeeze, they use the next best thing, his mother. Still going through the immortal sickness herself, Kathy Bates finally drinks a blood mixture made specifically for Gaga by the cross-dressing bartender Liz Taylor. Over blood cocktails and cat food (read: liver pate) for some arrogant hipster guests, Liz reveals his story. He's not gay nor does he say he is a transgender but just a crossdresser.


Thirty years prior he had a family, a wife and a kid and either flew airplanes or was a pharmaceutical rep (did anyone else get confused by that? He said that the picture of the airplane the boy drew was wrong because he flew in a 757, right? But he also said he was a rep). One day, while on a business trip to LA, he meets Gaga as she sneaks into his room while he is having a Chaka Khan's "I'm Every Woman" moment. Completely wasting the chance for Gaga to say the words, "you're on the right track baby, you were born this way," she instead convinces him to no longer hide and walk down the hall in a negligee, fur and makeup. He does and gets caught by the guys on the business trip with him. They tease, then gay bash, then throats get sliced open by Gaga and he never goes back to his family, sending them money until the youngest kid turned 18. The takeaway: he's not a frickin' vampire or a ghost!


His bravery--or deadbeatness, whichever--inspires Kathy Bates to kill the uppity guests and feed on them as she will be visible, she will matter.


Meanwhile, the detective did nothing the whole episode but freak out about everything. Now, lately I've been feeling a little mentally slower than normal and it has concerned me greatly, but I made sure to pay close attention last night and I was quite confused on his story too. Last week after attending the murder ghost soiree (fancy word for dinner party) he ended up leaving with Blonde And Teased, Sarah Paulson's character. But when we first see him on this week's episode, he is in his captain's office complaining about doing a full building search on these people claiming to be famed killers. His reputation already fractured after a mental break suffered five years earlier, his captain can't have such behavior reflect badly on his precinct and fires dude. And I was all like, "what!?" They're firing people now because they don't want to go through the hassle of doing their own job, basically? Whoa! OK.


And as if that weren't confusing enough, his next scene had him waking in bed with blondie but not remembering it. Now, did she save him that night, take him to his room, screw the memory of sex right out of him, he went to the police station, got fired, came back to the hotel where she subsequently screwed him so good she sexed his memory out AGAIN because that's how they played it unless there was some time-jump in there I'm not aware of. Dude woke up and demanded she get out of his bed as only bits and pieces of their slap and tickle session flashed through his mind.

I had sex with who? How many times? 

I'm not really sure where his story line is going but with his wife now sleeping in a coffin with their vampire son and him not being any wiser that she's even moved into the hotel, one question I do have is who the hell is taking care of their daughter? Did that bother anyone else? I mean, you got these bloodthirsty vampire kids about to take over the city and I don't know where their other child is. And that is truly terrifying.


What do you think? Are you loving this season of American Horror Story or is it not your most favorite rendition? Do you think Angela, Matt and Kathy will bring down Gaga or are they all fated for some big weird vampire sex scene (hey, it's two ex-lovers and an old lady. I'm just saying Gaga doesn't discriminate)? And what do you think will develop from the kid vampires? Will they have to get their own rendition of Van Helsing up in there? Let me know in the comments below (hint: click the no comments button if you see no comments).

Check out my new comedy novel Yep, I'm Totally Stalking My Ex-Boyfriend. #AhStalking
If you’re looking for a scare check #AFuriousWind#DARKER#BrandNewHome or  #ThePowerOfTen. For those interested in something a little more dramatic, check out #TheWriter. The full first season is out now NOW exclusively on Amazon. If you like fast action crime check out #ADangerousLow. The sequel A New Low will be out in a few months. Join us on Goodreads to talk about books and TV, and subscribe to and follow my blog with that Google+ button to the right side.

Until next time, "'when there's some-thing strange in your neigh-bor-hood, who you gonna call?' Wait, do the Ghostbusters do vampires or just demons, gooey green blobs and overgrown marshmallows?"

P.S. I swear when I first saw Angela Bassett's character I thought for sure they were doing their own female take on Van Helsing which makes Gaga sorta Dracula. Come on, a Vampire infestation only has about two names on the list: Dracula and Abraham Lincoln Vampire Slayer. It's true. Better sign-off next time. You know the deal.

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